A special dose of chizzuk
A SPECIAL DOSE OF CHIZZUK The following is a transcribed and edited message by Yissachar Berg [https://ravberland.com/tag/rabbi-yissachar-berg/] that was recently circulated to give some much needed chizzuk, during these difficult and confusing times preceding the revelation of Moshiach. ==== IN THIS WORLD WE ARE VERY USED TO GRADING EVERYTHING. When using a grading system itâs easier to judge whether we are accomplishing or not accomplishing a certain task. When it comes to education, the educational system nowadays is structured based on grades. We grade children based on their knowledge, understanding, or how well they memorized the material. And we also grade ourselves with everything that we do we always try to find some kind of grading system. WHEN IT COMES TO LIMUD CHOL/ NONRELIGIOUS TOPICS IT IS VERY EASY TO GRADE. You have your math exam and itâs very easy to tell if you got the answer right or you got the answer wrong. Itâs easy to grade yourself at work whether you accomplished a certain task or reached a certain deadline. In the physical world/ the two-dimensional world itâs very easy to chart it out and to have clear grades based on our accomplishment. ==== SPIRITUAL WORLD: EFFORT VS. KNOWLEDGE ACQUISITION, UNDERSTANDING & RETENTION When it comes to spiritual work, however, itâs much more difficult, and itâs also not meant to be graded in the kind of way that we are used to grading. Also, the Jewish people have fallen to a level where Jewish schools are using the same grading system as non-Jewish schools, where they base the greatness of the students on how well they perform in exams. They are tested on Chumash, Navi, Gemara, Mishnayos, just as they would be tested on non-Jewish subjects. And thatâs basically how the system judges how âgoodâ a student is. But that is misleading and wrong because spiritual work; Torah knowledge, is not graded by how much you know and how much you can prove you understand more than others. ITâS GRADED ONLY ON EFFORT. ==== HASHEM WANTS THE HEART. He doesnât want the mind, He doesnât want you to prove that you were created smarter than someone else, and you understand the material faster. That doesnât mean that youâre any better. And if you put less effort into it, then youâre actually less than the person putting in more effort, even if you understand it better than them, because that person who is working harder to achieve is on a much higher level. There are many stories about this, of Tzadikim who spoke this way. Thereâs also a lot of discussion about this especially in Breslev sefarim about how the main thing is the effort, and even if you didnât accomplish anything the effort itself is the accomplishment, and this is the way the world was meant to be. ==== STRUGGLES & HARD WORK When the first man sinned in the Etz haâDaas / he ate from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. HE BASICALLY MADE THIS MISTAKE OF TRYING TO JUDGE EVERYTHING BASED ON CLEAR DEFINITIONS OF GOOD AND EVIL. But thatâs not the way the world was created. The world was created in order for us to eat from the Etz HaChaim/ the Tree of Life. The Tree of Life is the process, the Tree of Life is the struggle, and the Tree of Life is the effort. LIFE MEANS TO HAVE BLOOD FLOWING THROUGH YOUR VEINS, IT MEANS TO STRUGGLE AND TO GROW; DEATH IS THE END POINT LYING IN THE GRAVE, HUMANITIES END âGOALâ. Since man did not heed Hashem's Voice, he ate from the tree of knowledge of good and evil, and he brought death to the world. Man was born immortal. It's a life of struggle and uncertainty rather than a life of clear goals and accomplishments never ends because you never âget thereâ youâre âgetting thereâ all the time. Man always wants to reach out to the fruit, to reach out for their accomplishments for the definition of good and evil. But thatâs our mistake; and we keep making the same mistake again, of eating from the Etz haâDaas/ The Tree of Knowledge. LIFE IS NOT ABOUT KNOWLEDGE OF GOOD AND EVIL. ITâS ABOUT LIVING. You are living if your heart is beating through you, and youâre struggling. In life you have to exert effort. We always want to have both. We want to have the Tree of Life and have the Tree of Knowledge, both the effort and the reward. But if we are always focused on the future reward while exerting effort we are also missing the point. Again we eat the fruit. Because the effort is itself the reward. Schar Mitzvah Mitzvah/ the reward of the effort should be the mitzvah itself. This world is a world of effort, a world of struggling. The next world is where you reap the benefit of your effort. Because in next world we go back to we we were in Gan Eden before the sin, where the effort itself is the reward. ==== WHY DO I SOMETIMES FEEL LIKE IâM NOT CONNECTING? Why is it that when someone begins serving Hashem; Hashem gives that person such an awesome feeling and emotion for example when theyâre saying Tehillim, or praying, or doing something holy and then later on the excitement disappears? Rabbi Nachman talks about this. He says the first time that a person comes close he is shown a great, awesome, holy light, and then it gets taken away from him. And the truth is, the purpose of feeling that tremendous light in spiritual avodah is not because that awesome feeling is the goal. Itâs given to you in order that when itâs taken away you will have the motivation to continue and strive for greater heights. == You received a feeling deep down inside your heart that thereâs something real and thereâs something powerful here. Hashem showed you a burst of light; a burst of inspiration. You see the truth, you see the path, you see what the Tzadik is, and you know that this is the true way. And then Hashem takes it all away from you and says; now I want you to accomplish something more. RABBI NACHMAN TEACHES THAT THE MAIN BENEFIT FROM SERVING HASHEM IS NOT WHEN YOU FEEL IT AND WHEN YOU SEE, AND WHEN ITâS READILY APPARENT. The beautiful light of Hashem/ the beautiful light of the Torah/ The beautiful light of the Tzadik; itâs only beneficial when itâs hidden. So actually, it comes out from this that when youâre doing something out of inspiration thatâs when youâre actually not accomplishing. Itâs the exact opposite of what you thought at first. Thereâs a Plan in the Darkness. ==== THE SECRET IS THIS: When it comes to true service of Hashem, something that will actually benefit you, and benefit the world, at the time you are doing it you wonât feel it, but you continue because deep down you know it to be true. Rabbi Nachman explains that this is why when Moshiach comes there will no longer be a possibility to do tshuva. No longer will converts be accepted because the truth will be clear. The only time that baalei tshuva/ and converts are accepted is when thereâs darkness and difficulty; when you donât feel it. Otherwise if everyone would only do it when they feel it, then everyone is the same, and no better than an animal who follows their animal instincts and what feels good. If you are following your feelings why should you be any better than anyone else following their hearts desire? SINNERS ALSO FOLLOW AFTER THEIR HEART. So, you were created with a heart that has more sensitivity to good things, and youâre following after your heart as well, but youâre not any better than anyone else. The real moment, and the only time when we are accomplishing is when we donât feel it. When itâs dark. ==== SO, HASHEM IN HIS INFINITE KINDNESS TAKES AWAY FROM US ALL FEELINGS AND INSPIRATION. Then we can tap into a very, very deep place of emunah, naase vânishma. Only then are we accomplishing, only then are we living, only the work we do at those moments are eternal. Therefore, Rabbi Nachman says that weâre given a small taste at the beginning to feel the light. Itâs not anything similar or nearly close to the True Light that we will see and receive pleasure from in the future. Itâs only a tiny, tiny small sample of what its going to be like. That spark is supposed to encourage us to go in the right direction and to continue doing the work when we donât feel anything. The main work and only work is actually when you donât feel anything. ==== Now, it also says that if someone is always inspired in their spiritual work then itâs probably coming from the other side. Itâs very possible that a person is performing spiritual work and is given strength from the other side. Why is that? THE SITRA ACHRA WANTS PEOPLE TO SERVE HASHEM FOR PERSONAL, ULTERIOR MOTIVES, NOT FOR THE SAKE OF HASHEM. They would love for people to become Talmidei Chachamim in order to bolster themselves, their ego, and their honor. So they make it easy for them. The Rav, Rabbi Eliezer Berland, shlita, would always speak in his yeshiva that everyone has to learn at least 8 hours of Gemara everyday, no different than any other Yeshiva. He would say, âBreslov is not meant to replace anything, just to add to what already exists. And just like every yeshiva focuses on minimum of 8 hours a day of Gemara learning, also we have to do that. And then we can add to that and do 8 hours of dancing, of hisbodidut, and 8 hours of Tehillim/ kivrei tzaddikim, whatever it is. But the basis needs to remain the same as every other yeshiva!' And the Rav would talk about this all the time in very strong ways. == One time, one of the exceptional students and a huge oved Hashem, sought advice from the Rav, asking if the main focus is Gemara like perhaps other yeshivot, then why donât I go learn in another Yeshiva where their Kol Torah is so powerful, and it looks like they are learning without any obstacles? HERE, EVERYTHING IS A STRUGGLE. He told the Rav that it didnât seem like they have all the obstacles like we have when we sit and learn. I feel such a struggle, my heart is drained, I can barely get a word out, barely understand anything. Maybe I should just join another yeshiva and then Iâll be able to fulfill all the things the Rav is emphasizing, what the Rav wants us to fulfill to learn Gemara all day and night... The Rav answered: IF YOU SEE A PLACE WHERE THEY ARE LEARNING TORAH DAY AND NIGHT WITHOUT ANY OBSTACLES, THE REASON IS BECAUSE ITâS ALL GOING TO THE SITRA ACHRA. ITâS ALL GOING TO THE OTHER SIDE. ==== WHY ARE THEY LEARNING? Because they want to boast that theyâre better than the others, to become a bigger Talmid Chocham, to write sefarim, to become well known, or maybe they want to get a good shidduch, or maybe so that their children should get a good shidduch, or they should get a good job as a Rabbi. They have all these other reasons theyâre doing it, but itâs for themselves. THEY ARENâT DOING IT FOR HASHEM. Therefore, the sitra achra is actually standing right by them and encouraging them, and thatâs why itâs so easy for them. You, on the other hand are doing it for Hashem. So when you sit down, every word is much more powerful than thousands and thousands of years of people doing it for other reasons. And thatâs why itâs so difficult for you because itâs so important and because itâs so powerful. THATâS WHY YOU DONâT FEEL ANYTHING. ==== WE NEED TO TAKE THIS MESSAGE TO HEART. Many of us in our own avodas Hashem struggle with this all the time. People say that sometimes saying Tehillim and davening would feel like being mamash right next to the Kotel, like Hashem is holding them, every word would be so deep and holy, and purifying. They would feel so connected during Shimona Esray and be able to say it for an hour straight with complete dveikus/ holy intent. All the mitzvos, all the Torah would be so meaningful to them and make them feel so connected. These feelings of connection are so high and amazing, and thatâs what brings people to search for a true path, and thatâs actually what brings many to the Tzadik at first. Many people donât find connections like this anywhere else, with avodas halev/ of the heart. But each time, as soon as a person gets to where they wanted to go and wanted to take it a step further, it is all taken away. ==== ALL OF THE SUDDEN THEY ARE STRUGGLING TO DAVEN, THEY CANâT LEARN, AND CANâT FEEL ANYTHING. They begin to doubt if they are on the right path at all. This is all very confusing and frustrating, not to feel anything anymore. It doesnât make sense, it is hard to understand, and this is also very heartbreaking. THAT ALL OF A SUDDEN EVERYTHING COLLAPSED. Especially when someone has started a new path, a new level, and connecting closer to the truth. Everyone knows what is says in Likutei Moharan that yerida tachlet haâaliyah; that when someone enters into avodas Hashem and whenever someone starts new beginnings, each time he has to fall before getting up. WHEN YOUâRE GOING UP TO A NEW LEVEL YOU HAVE TO FIRST GO DOWN. Every ascent needs to be preceded by a decent because Chazal teach, the bigger a person the bigger the yetzer hora. In other places Rabbi Nachman speaks about it even more powerfully and says that when you come to the Tzadik, when you start following the advice of the Tzadik, youâre not going to feel anything. Thatâs actually the biggest struggle. ==== THE BIGGEST STRUGGLE IS NOT FEELING ANYTHING. Again, along the way a person is given some sparks to keep him going, if heâs feeling like heâs on the verge of giving up, and feels like just stopping, he needs some gas. So Hashem gives you a little bit of gas to go on a bit more, until again the process continues. But the main accomplishment is when youâre not feeling it, when ever step, every word is a struggle. ==== MANY PEOPLE SHARE THEIR FEELINGS ABOUT THEIR DIFFICULTIES, ESPECIALLY NOT BEING ABLE TO HAVE KAVANA. Itâs so common for people to say âyou have no idea how difficult it is to say Tikkun HaKlali, and Perakim Nevarchimâ. That is because weâre in a war and each word is destroying hundreds of spiritual enemies. The more powerful, the more difficult; the more difficult, the more powerful. THE MORE DIFFICULT IT IS THE MORE IT SHOWS HOW MUCH ITâS NEEDED RIGHT NOW. Logically it shouldnât be so difficult to say a few chapters of Psalms. This unexplainable difficulty and heaviness should prove to us just how powerful it is. ==== IF YOU WANT TO GRADE HOW IMPORTANT YOUR PRAYERS/ AVODAH ARE, IS EXACTLY THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT PEOPLE USUALLY THINK. Once you know you are on the right path and following the Torah, itâs not about how much you feel, or how easy it is for you. Rather, if itâs more difficult for you then itâs most probably something thatâs more needed and this is why itâs more of a struggle. How does a person know what their Tikkun/ mission is in this world? What your real struggle is thatâs what your tikkun is. ==== Rabbi Nachman says every time I come to sit down to give a drasha Iâm not able to get one word out. Thereâs such darkness, and such difficulty, that I canât even get out one word. People are mistaken in thinking that Tzadikim are always on ahigh, always flying, always connected to Hashem, and that everything is always flowing. TZADIKIM HAVE THE GREATEST STRUGGLE, MUCH MORE THAN ANYONE ELSE. Your feeling of emptiness, feeling of being drained and not able to get out one word- the Tzadikim also felt this way, and the higher the level of the Tzadik the more the struggle. They feel the same; they feel like the whole world is on their shoulders. They feel like a million knives are cutting their flesh. Every word that they get out is torture, and you can see this in the Ravs face sometimes during davening, the Tzadikim are always fighting a war, with exceptional, powerful koach. ==== IT SAYS, AIN HATORAH MITKAYEMET ELAH BâMI SHEMEIMIT ATZMO ALEHA. Itâs literal. The  Torah is not sustained in a person unless they are working and struggling beyond belief over it. They feel like theyâre getting tortured and they canât get a word out. The more a person comes closer to the true avodah the more difficult it will be. That actually shows that youâre on the right path and that actually shows that youâre on a higher level. And it should encourage you to continue because maybe in the past your 7 Tikkun HaKlali and Perakim Nevarim made you feel connected, and now youâre felling less and less connected, and you want to give up. THATâS BECAUSE WE HAVE A FALSE IDEA OF HOW TO GRADE OUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS. But really itâs the opposite. ==== THE MORE DRAINED YOU FEEL, THE MORE YOUâRE ACTUALLY ACCOMPLISHING. Youâre actually fulfilling and winning this war, because really itâs illogical. Think about it. Why should it be so difficult? How many words do we say throughout a day? We can talk to our friends for hours on end without any difficulty. All of a sudden, weâre talking to Hashem and we canât get one word out? Itâs illogical. And that itself should prove to us everything that weâve been saying. Since itâs illogical that itâs so difficult just to say a few words, to speak out some words for an hour or an hour and a half, when throughout the day weâre constantly speaking without any problemâ it doesnât make any sense why it should be so difficult. People who have Tehillim groups with all their friends, itâs not so difficult and can even be enjoyable. ==== SO, SINCE ITâS SO ILLOGICAL THAT IT SHOULD BE SO DIFFICULT THAT SHOULD PROVE TO US HOW POWERFUL IT REALLY IS. With the true measurement of how to determine spiritual accomplishment, which is by lefum tzaâara agra/ the more difficult the more rewarding. In our minds we think the opposite. The Rav always says that Likutei Halachos; usually teaches the opposite of what people naturally think. For example; people always think that the way to judge accomplishment is by how much you feel it. But the real measurement is the opposite. The more difficult it is, the more struggle it is, then the more youâre accomplishing. ==== DISCLAIMER: Someone reading this might say, âOkay, Iâm just going to choose difficult things to do and then Iâll be accomplishing moreâŚâ No. If youâre following the etzos of the Tzadik and itâs difficult, then itâs showing how great it is. But if youâre following your own personal etzos/ your own ideas then you might do stuff in your life thatâs difficult, but that doesnât mean itâs good. If itâs good it will be difficult, but difficulty on its own doesnât mean itâs good. If youâre not looking for truth nothing will help you. All this advice is only for someone looking for truth. ==== Rabbi Nachman says the same exact action that you choose to do on your own will be very easy for you and you will feel tremendous accomplishments, encouragement, and connections. But as soon as I tell you to do it that thing will be covered in tremendous difficulty, and many obstacles will stand in your way. REBBE NACHMAN ACTUALLY SAID THIS ABOUT THE TIKKUN HAKLALI. The fact that I told you to do it just makes it almost impossible for you to do it, because as soon as the etza comes out of the mouth of a Tzadik that etza is the seed, itâs creating the world anew. The etza of the Tzadik is a new creation, itâs bringing the geula to the world and something that is so powerful, certainly all the klipas and the sitra achra are trying to stop you from doing it. AND THATâS WHY YOU FEEL DARKNESS. ==== BUT WE SHOULD NO LONGER TRY TO JUDGE OUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS BASED ON OUR FEELINGS. We are nothing. Like one of the Breslev mashpiim of the previous generations used to say,your mouth has to be like a grind mill, constantly grinding, moving. Doesnât matter you feel or you donât feel. THATâS ALL JUST BILBULIM TRYING TO CONFUSE YOU. Just grind the words out whether you feel it or you donât. Every once in a while you may feel something incredible; Hashem will give you a burst of inspiration and of clear truth and thatâs amazing and itâs a good thing, itâs not a bad thing. It will give you encouragement to go on for however long you can last with that last little bit of gas. THEN IT WILL BE TAKEN AWAY AGAIN. Itâs beautiful to feel, itâs a very good thing to feel. But we canât base our avodah on how weâre feeling. We donât know the real koach of Torah. If you are in a low place, thatâs exactly why you should not give up, because itâs only in order to bring you up to higher places. ==== https://ravberland.com/hashem-is-waiting-for-every-word-of-your-prayers/