The Secret of Overcoming: When the Entire World Cries Out to You to Return in Teshuvah
Lesson No. 54 | Early Monday Morning, Parashas Shemini, 4th Day of Chol HaMoed Pesach, 19 Nissan 5756
The evil inclination grows stronger from day to day, and in order to defeat it, a true awakening and the uprooting of laziness are required. Through the deep sense of lowliness of Rabbi Nosson of Breslov, it is revealed how all of creation—from the stones in the wall to the wailing sirens in the street—signals a person to return to his Creator.
A person must escape the immodesty of the streets, walking with closed eyes so as not to see all the impurity around him. Specifically in this generation, the one who overcomes and strengthens himself is the one who will bring the Geulah (Redemption). Upon those few who strengthen themselves and practice self-sacrifice for the holiness of their eyes and thoughts, the entire Geulah and the complete tikkun (rectification) of the world depend.
The Evil Inclination That Grows Stronger Day by Day
Rabbi Nosson of Breslov says in his immense humility: "If, due to my many sins, I am lax in the work of Heaven, I am the worst of all." A person can sleep for hours upon hours, but how much can a Jew sleep? After all, it is said:
"The voice of my Beloved knocks"
The soul is always knocking from above, and a person must arise. If he only gets up when he feels like it, and he does not break himself and tear himself to pieces in the service of Hashem, a day will come when he will fall. Materialism only grows stronger from day to day. The evil inclination of a fourteen-year-old is not the evil inclination of a thirteen-year-old, and that of an eighteen-year-old is not that of a seventeen-year-old. The evil inclination only continues to intensify, and if a person does not immediately learn to overcome it and break his desires, he will not survive spiritually.
"You Have Never Had a Case as Severe as Mine"
Out of this deep sense of lowliness, Rabbi Nosson turns to the Creator of the world and says: "Master of the Universe, You have already made many baalei teshuvah (returnees to the faith), as it is said:
'Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand'
From the time of Avraham Avinu, Mesushelach, and Noach, there have been baalei teshuvah in every generation. But a person of my sort, so coarse, with such weakness, sunk so deeply—no one of my kind has ever returned in teshuvah (repentance)!" Rabbi Nosson felt that Hashem sends everyone a spark of Godliness, some inner burning, but upon him, as it were, no spark had any effect. This is how he truly felt about himself, out of an absolute recognition of his own nothingness before the Creator.
Who can feel such lowliness? Only someone who truly believes that Hashem is in the world and sees him every second. When a person truly thinks that he is being watched at any given moment, he is simply incapable of sinning. Even one of the greatest of the wicked Germans, may his name be erased, once explicitly admitted: "The moment I think about God, I cannot do anything. If I am being watched from above all the time, I simply cannot move." When a person lives with the awareness that he is being watched even in the innermost chambers, his entire reality changes.
The Sirens from the Six Days of Creation
All of reality cries out to a person not to sin. The verse states:
"For a stone shall cry out from the wall, and a splinter of wood shall answer it"
The walls, the wooden boards, the potted plants in the house—they all scream: "Do not commit a sin!" Just as Hashem created the mouth of the donkey to shout at Bilaam, so too does the donkey shout at each and every person. A person goes to commit a sin, goes to a bad friend, and suddenly he hears sirens in the street. The whole street is blaring—police cars, ambulances, fire trucks. He feels like the world is about to turn upside down.
All these noises and sirens are not coincidental. Everything has been planned since the Six Days of Creation to signal to a person: "Where are you going? Go back home! Do not commit the sin!" The whole world rages and storms the moment a Jew is about to do something wrong, just to awaken him to return in teshuvah (repentance).
Facing all these warnings, a person stands and cries out like Rabbi Nosson: "Master of the Universe, You have made billions of baalei teshuvah, but You have never had a case as severe as mine! To deal with a person of my sort—You have never experienced this. But what can I do? You are Omnipotent, and You created me this way. I have thrown myself down to wherever I have fallen, but only You can pull me out of there and help me truly return to You."
Part 1 of 2 — Lesson No. 54
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